Phew

My sister has left Facebook. The nephews are still on it, and I think the youngest of those nephews (16) could use some parental supervision, but I'm glad she's gone from Facebook. It was kind of like the weirdness when your mom joins Facebook and makes inappropriate comments on your status updates. Yes, my sister did that.

While I was out west, she made a comment that even though she is exceedingly conservative and thinks Ann Coulter is a Goddess (it made me throw up a little in my mouth just to type the name), she only joined all sorts of ultra conservative Facebook groups just to piss me off. I never commented on such behavior, and mostly tried to ignore her presence so it's just screaming for the comment, "How....mature." Yes, she is my *older* sister. I asked why she left and she sent me a rambling email that smacked of right-wing paranoia.

I mentioned a couple days ago that my sister is becoming a caricature. A caricature of what, you might ask....an entitled, wealthy and bored suburban housewife. She's always been that, but it's just getting worse. Her appearance, for one. She's all into using Latisse on her eyelashes and so her eyelashes are cartoon long - but she's too vain to wear eyeglasses or contacts and can't see to put on makeup...it's all smudged and garish. She's thinner than ever - but eats like a horse (I predict a third septic system in current house in the near future - stomach acids wreck the flora of a septic system and consequently wreck the septic system). She's all about her designer labels. Her days revolve around online shopping. She's taking a Spanish class so she can speak better with "service" people. I kid you not.

She has one child left at home, and doesn't seem to do much for or with him - hence he's becoming quite the snot (right, eba?). Absentee parent who lives in the same house. I think my brother in law is an ass, but he's the one that gets the youngest going in the morning (though litte other guidance from what I can tell). My sister sleeps in every day. Every. Day.

After we had lunch with our mother, I noted that my mom finally had handicapped plates on her car (two knee replacements, major back surgery, etc.), and my sister said, "Yeah, but she refuses to get the rearview mirror thingy for me to use. Do you know what a pain it is to walk from the far end of a parking lot when there are all these handicapped spaces empty right in front of the store? She's so insensitive."

Just let all that settle for a sec. You can't make this shit up.

In spite of the email response about her Facebook departure, my sister currently will not return my phone calls. I think it has to do with the book. My mom is currently on a bragging spree about the fact that I wrote the book (only took 43 years for the woman to express pride in me - but that's another post), and my sister is jealous. She's always been wacko about perceptions of favoritism from our parents, and this isn't helping. If she's not getting all the attention, then the parent in question loves my brother or me more, has always treated her terribly, and woe is her life, and can't we see how awful it is to be her?

Um, yeah.

And the family wonders why we don't come visit.