My Boy, He Doesn’t Like Change So Much

For the last six years, I have worked the following schedule: I work from home on Monday, go into the office Tuesday and Thursday, Wednesday and Friday are off days.

The schedule originally came about around availability of after school care. It works well for us. I’m very lucky that I have been able to maintain this schedule and have the kids covered. But it’s a delicate balance, too. Every spring I have to worry if each of the kids programs will accept them for the next school year with the same schedule, and this school year was the first time I didn’t start the year on at least one wait list for the schedule.

When I was offered this new job, before I even accepted, I was able to arrange with a friend to have the boys covered on the first two Mondays after school. I knew this was necessary to ramp up to my new position, and again, I am lucky that I have been able to sort out this schedule. Next week I’ll be back to the standard, but today was the second covered-by-a-friend-after-school Monday.

This morning, and last Monday morning, C has been so, so grumpy with me. More than just the usual Monday-morning-I-wish-it-were-still-the-weekend grumpies. He’s been almost nasty.

Each morning I pulled him aside and asked him straight out what was going on. He, of course, said, “Nothing.”

Bull, of course.

Then I gave him a chance to pull himself together. I warned him of the consequences of continued poor behavior. It made no difference.

I pulled him aside again, tried again to get to the bottom of what is bothering him.

I asked him this morning if he was mad about going to D’s house after school. He waited a beat and said, “Maybe.”

Ah, well then. I strongly suspected this last week, but figured that after he had a good time with D the first time, the second time would be fine. Apparently, I was wrong.

Perhaps the impending anniversary of his illness plays into it a little, too, but as I think about this big boy of mine, I can think of other times he’s had a tough time with things out of routine.

I seems that my boy is rather change-averse.

I wonder why I haven’t really thought about this before. About why it is or how to help him manage variations in routine better.

Something to ponder.